Your Eyes are Heavy... You are VERY Sleepy...
Mommies of the world - I need help. My husband and I have been pretty "loose" about our rules concerning kids in our bed. When the kids were smaller, if they fell asleep in our bed we would simply move them to their own beds where they would stay until morning. We aren't "family bed" type of people, it's just that we liked having the kids with us until bed time, especially since we don't see them all day (guilt, guilt).
Lately I've tried to get them to fall asleep in their own beds - but it's not always easy when I'm the only one home (which happens more often than not). If I'm in my daughter's room my son comes in and vice versa. Plus, even when they do fall asleep in their own rooms, they venture into our rooms in the middle of the night. Some nights I get up and walk them back to their rooms, then lay down in their bed for a short time with them (which last time gave me a pinched nerve from hell). Many nights I am just too tired so I roll over and let them in the bed - only to wake up with aches and pains from feet, arms and knees in my back all night.
My four year old understands bribery, "stay in your bed at night all week and we'll get you something special!" - she usually makes it two nights in a row then it's back to the same old thing. And the two year old? - Forget it. He wants Mommy, Mommy, and more Mommy. Plus when he sleeps next to me he grabs at my hair like a cat clawing a ball of yarn (one of the reasons for my recent hair cut). I am miserable when it comes to sleep. Is there some magic thing I don't know about? I realize these are just bad habits which are totally my fault, but what can I do about it now? HELP!
Lately I've tried to get them to fall asleep in their own beds - but it's not always easy when I'm the only one home (which happens more often than not). If I'm in my daughter's room my son comes in and vice versa. Plus, even when they do fall asleep in their own rooms, they venture into our rooms in the middle of the night. Some nights I get up and walk them back to their rooms, then lay down in their bed for a short time with them (which last time gave me a pinched nerve from hell). Many nights I am just too tired so I roll over and let them in the bed - only to wake up with aches and pains from feet, arms and knees in my back all night.
My four year old understands bribery, "stay in your bed at night all week and we'll get you something special!" - she usually makes it two nights in a row then it's back to the same old thing. And the two year old? - Forget it. He wants Mommy, Mommy, and more Mommy. Plus when he sleeps next to me he grabs at my hair like a cat clawing a ball of yarn (one of the reasons for my recent hair cut). I am miserable when it comes to sleep. Is there some magic thing I don't know about? I realize these are just bad habits which are totally my fault, but what can I do about it now? HELP!
I can't offer advice for multiple children, because we only have the one, but for our 19 month old, we have a pretty good bedtime routine, if I do say so myself. Granted, he still is in his crib, so he couldn't get up and leave, but he doesn't even fuss. We used to go in there if he made so much as a peep, including in the middle of the night. Around his first birthday, the doctor said we needed to stop that and let him learn to fall asleep on his own. Well, for maybe 3 or 4 hard evenings he would cry for ten minutes at bedtime after I left the room, but then...it stopped. Now every night we read a few stories. For the last story, we sit on the couch together and he has a small cup of milk while we read it, then I bring him upstairs, hand him Tigger, kiss him good night, and leave the room...and that's it. Not a peep. We keep the monitor on, and I usually hear him roll over shortly after I leave the room, and then he goes right to sleep. Maybe if you give yourself and your youngest a couple tough evenings when it's "no nonsense", then things will fall into place. My son just knows and accepts that when we start our bedtime routine, it is going to be bedtime. Plus, he goes to bed at the same time every night, unless he misses his nap, then he goes earlier...Good luck!
Posted by
Anonymous |
1:22 PM
I know I need to get them in a bedtime routine and to stick to it - you've given me a great place to start. I'm sure it won't be easy but, I need to take back my nights for sanity's sake... so - here's hoping it goes well! (My son loves tigger too!)
Posted by
PreppyGirl |
1:52 PM
I know it's not "solving" the problem, but you could just have them sleep on palettes on the floor next to your bed. That is what Magda does when she comes in to my room in the middle of the night since she was banished from my bed (for the same reasons as yours).
I know the ideal is to "tough love" it and force them to stay in bed but when you are tired and just want to sleep it's not fun for either of you to fight it out getting up 3 and 4 times a night. They are still young and they get scared (I know I snuck into my parents room many times til I was probably 8 or 9 years old).
Posted by
princess slea |
3:49 PM
Hey princess... do you really think my husband is getting up to take them back to bed? HA! He's so big that he takes up ALL of his half of the bed while me & the kids share the other side.
Posted by
PreppyGirl |
10:01 AM
By "either of you", I meant you and Kate or Pete. That's funny, the thought of the husband getting up to deal with it never crossed my mind.
Posted by
princess slea |
11:08 AM